James 4:8-10

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.

Return. to God
as lost sheep if we never knew Him, or as one who has turned back to your old ways after first meeting Him

Respond..to God
to humble ourselves, surrender to His will, to submit to His plans

Remain. in God
in intimate, close constant fellowship with out loving Father

BFC Youth Camp 2004 has past by as quickly as it came. Im really having mixed feelings right now. On one hand, I can't seem to forget all about the camp, and am to fearful of going back into the world. On the other hand, I so want to go back into the world to show what I have learnt, to impact the world. Im sure that many, like me, will miss camp so, so much. We can't deny it. But indeed, we cannot be always looking to the things that are behind. In Phil 3:13-14, the Bible says, "Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. " We ought to forget the things that are behind (the camp), and reach foward to those things which are ahead.

Tomorrow, I will be going back for training, after not training for a week! But Im fearful of what is to come my way. After basking in the fellowship with God's people for one week, what is to become of me when I return to my friends of this world? I really dunno. Im praying and trusting that God may give me the grace and strength I need tomorrow, and the days ahead.

AS I had shared many times, this camp has been a totally different experience for me. The past two years of camp, to be honest, I had been to grossly immersed in the world before I am taken out of it and placed in a clean and pure place of Christian fellowship where God is present. Hence, I could still remember the conviction that God had put upon me last year. I was too disgusting to be placed before His presence. I had to be cleansed and purified before I was able to stand before Him and worship Him. That was last year. I thank God this year I went to camp with a heart all prepared for God, who is Holy Holy and Holy. Even children's camp, the week before spurred me on. So I can say that Im quite prepared for this youth camp. Last year's youth camp had been a turning point for my life. After commiting to God what I did, I was invited to join Darrell, Joo, Darren and Ivan for bible study. It was the first few months of the year when I was taken in for discipleship. I had to say God used this period of time very very well as I took in all that I could take in from the Bible studies. It was a start of a very personal relationship with God. And it didnt end there. It was not long before we became distracted. Our meetings became a more "fellowship" based, in a sense that we no longer could see how God can work in us. The world had such a dulling effect on our spiritual life that we were ensnared by it. Worldliness began to seep into each one's life. We weren't prepared for that. By that time, I was already thinking why we christians had to be going about in this cycle, which I will very well explain later. From then on, I believe our group parted. We no longer became a group where we would come down every wednesday night for bible study, and could hold each one accountable for the things we were doing, but it was more of a group that was out there to have fun and all. I got revived during June Camp. From then on, I never left the Lord as I did before. I am thankful that my relationship with Him was close, though at times, I just backslided without knowing it. This 4 months of close intimate fellowship with God was not smooth sailing, I was tried and tested in so many ways, which, looking back found we awed and amazed at how God worked so mightily in my ways. I realised that each painful refining process I was put through moulded me into the person I am now. I realised that all of that happened for a reason. And most importantly, God really works in His own ways. I can really look back on my life and stand in awe of what and how God moulded me. ".. for when I am tried and purified, I shall come forth as gold.. "

SO this fellowship with God continued. I was abiding with my Lord in every way I can. I truly needed Him every hour of my life. I realised that I can never ever do, without Him.

My God is Near

Make me know your presence, Lord

The King of glory here

You know each thought and action,

Hope, anxiety and fear

How can I hide from Thee?

Can darkness hide iniquity?

O how can I unfaithful be

When You are very near, to me?

Chorus

When God is near

All the world seems far away

When God is near

Every fear is set aside

When God is near

How can I stray, How can I falter?

I'll stay upon the altar

I know my God is near.

Make me know your presence Lord

When I feel so alone

You know each trial and testing pain

The hurt that is unknown

O why can I not see

Thy hand so firmly guiding me

O how can I unfaithful be

When You are very near to me

If I were to relate everything about the camp here, I doubt you will be able to read finish. Haha, or rather I can't type finish. But I'll just relate some parts of the camp which I feel had left the deepest impression on my heart.

Honestly, I do not think that I had really encountered God through this camp. Hmmm, I mean I havent met with Him, and seen Him face to face. But there is this devotional on Friday that really comforted me. It tells that we should not restrict the Lord to a certain day, a certain time, or a certain way or method that He will meet with us. God works in His own ways and we really should stand in awe of that. IT doesnt have to be through a sermon, nor a worship service. God can meet with us anywhere, everywhere and anything, in any circumstance that we find ourselves in. Hence I think we should limit God in the areas which He will speak to us. I think I was so burdened the last night because I was so afraid that after so long, I didnt hear God speak to me, I thought that it was the last chance to encounter Him. But no, our dear Savior is ready to meet with us and allow us to encounter Him anytime anyday of our lives. So Im still praying for a encounter with my God. I really need to meet God and see Him! I realised through camp how I had been seeing too much of God's provision and how I missed the whole point, by not looking towards the Person, Himself. One more thing is that I had been too conscientious to do things the way others want it, and I had not been seeking what God really wants. It had been a painful realisation, but nevertheless, thaank God for showing it to me as I never knew that there was this problem with me. And at least through youth camp, God has shed some light about it. I think the question we should ask ourselves is whether we know God. We can serve God, we can do everything for God, but when it comes to the crucial questions, do we know God? -the Person we are working so hard for. Ha. I really think that when it comes to a point that just by hearing the name of Jesus can send so much joy and delight into this heart of ours, we can truly say that we know Him as He is. Its a very profound question. Do we know God? How do we answer that question, but by searching for Him? Jeremiah 29:13, You shall seek me and find me when you shall search for me with all of your heart. And in verse 14, it continues by saying, "I will be found by you". Isnt that a wonderful truth? If we truly seek God with all our hearts, God will allow Himself to be found by us and then, we can see God. Im still praying to really see God and know Him, who He really is.

Through the camp, I found that the messages didnt really exactly touch me or bring about any conviction. I was really worried at first. I would pray so hard about it. That if really, my heart is hardened, God would soften it and let me be so sensitive to His word. As I said, it was a different experience for me and a new one, I never felt this way. Though I was worried, I found out that there were people like Charissa and Vanessa who felt the same way too. Thankfully, my doubts were cleared when Sis Chiao Chyi talked to me about it. She explained that she too didnt really feel touched by the messages or what, and how we shouldnt base everything on our emotions, for the heart is wicked and decietful above all things. She said that sometimes, we should come to camp with a burden for the people around us. Indeed, I think it explained my question.

Hahaha, Im going to become super hyper already. Err.. No lah. Oh ya, my group SUPER STAYERS is really superb man. Thank God for every single member. Our group is really a cool group lor. Hmmm, let me SEE, there is ME : ) Joking. There is Charissa, Sandra, Cheryl(cheong), Zegang, Kelvin, Samuel, Oswald, Sis ChiaoChyi, Bro David Ong and David Tan, Sis Dawn. Wow! Haha. As Charissa always say, "I love my group" Its a special group lah. The WINNING team. Haahah. We are really a power group right? HAHA, but still thank God for all the blessings poured out on our group.

Last night was a special one. I was called to pray before the last worship service and I became so so burdened for many people, and also I realised how I wasnt ready for the last night's worship service. But I thank God that He really did reassure me that everything was under control while we were worshipping Him in songs and praises. "Show thyself strong, and the gates of hell shall never more prevail.. " Indeed, when God shows Himself strong, the gates of hell shall never more prevail against us. Its an encouragement to me to know that when God works, satan can do nothing to us. "The things we have are nothing, compared to knowing Christ.. " Indeed, how beautiful are these words to me. I realised at the last moment that I had been holding back somethings from God and refuse to give them up. But though the last message didnt impact me, but I think I am really glad that it has impacted many, even to the point of tears. The sharing by the youths were very sincere, and I thank God for every single one who stood up to share how God has worked in their lives. It was quite a touching scene to see how God can bring someone tears of joy when one recommits their lives to Him, and how comforting it is for close friends to shed tears for their friends. It was a touching sight.

Camp soon drew to a close. As we spent our last night on games, and in the end it didnt last very long because I think many were burnt out and tired. Esp me. But I think now many have committed to God their lives and its a matter of remaining in our God. One song that particularly touch me, and I believe we should all be meditating on its words is Keep Your Heart.

Now on this mountain-top

We have gleaned so many things.

We've been drawn closer to His heart,

A place where trial brings.

We have seen vict'ry over sin

and witnessed answered prayer.

We have known Christ be our only strength,

Found His Word a jewel rare.

Chorus:

Keep your heart, keep your heart,

Keep your heart with all diligence.

Keep it clean, keep it pure,

Make your love for Christ endure.

Guard your ears, guard you eyes,

Pressing onward to the prize.

Lest you fall, lest you fail,

Make your love for Christ prevail.

Now from your mountain-top

To your valley here below,

You have all of the armory

To defeat that wicked foe.

The vict'ry is at your command,

Your prayers He'll answer still.

Be the guardian of your only heart,

Heed this Word, His perfect will.

I have to say that this song is so meaningful to us, so applicable and so express what we should be feeling. AFter a mountain top experience with Christ, and going back to the valley below(the world), I think that we have to keep our hearts will all dilligence. Make our love for Christ endure, and guard our ears and guard our eyes. Keep our hearts with the commitments that we have made. ITs really so dramaticyou know. This spiritual battle is going on, and it appears so dramatic to me. Now after we are all armed with God's knowledge, God's truth, we should put on the whole armour of God and head to the battle field to join those who are fighting the battle for God with their lives. WE have all of the armory to defeat that wicked foe. Yes, we are equipped, but are we gonna fight and claim upon a victory that is already ours? OR are we gonna fight as if we are losers. I mean, either you continue in the things that we have learnt and committed to God, and go out to the world to fight a victorious battle, or we become discouraged at the testings that satan puts in our ways and fight as losers. So choose lah. Its either be defeated, or to be strong in the Lord! Share with you what I shared with my group, through our group's online group.

"My dear brothers and sisters in Christ, I have been burdened because I realised that after our spiritual victory in Christ, the devil is not gonna sit and do nothing. He is trying in all ways to discourage us, to sway us away from our sovereign God. I think, after camp, a long, weary and painful journey awaits us as we travel from the mountain top to the valley below. Be prayerful about the road that is ahead, take up the shield of faith to defend ourselves from the darts of the devil(Read Eph 6). We do not war against flesh, but against principalities, the devil. I think we should be constantly looking out for one another, being sensitive to each other's needs. As we travel this journey, from the mountain top to the valley belows, let us continue to be singing as we go along, praying, encouraging one another. I am so fearful that if we are not sober and aware enough, the devil can strike in the most subtle ways that we never knew, and all that is done in us will be gone within a few seconds.

So my beloved in Christ's, be strong in the Lord! "

So, indeed, we have to be strong in the Lord. I have a feeling, a very strong feeling that satan would not rest till he finds us defeated. He will by al means try to discourage us. The path ahead may be painful for God, but if we are willing, to bear this heavy cross for our Lord Jesus Christ, I believe at the end of it, He will reward us handsomely. Remember, the road ahead is tough, painful, long, weary, lets go on together praying, singing, encouraging one another!

For myself personally now, I think I had found peace while seeking the Lord. Throughout camp I found myself distracted and wandering from God. It has been something or someone that has been distracting my focus from my God. I think I have learnt to trust Him and to cast all my cares upon Him, and by doing so, I really recieved the peace that trancends all understandings. Thank You all who have been praying. I think I am now ready to forget the things which are behind and press on towards the things which are ahead. Now that I had laid aside every weight and sin that easily ensnares, and look only unto the author and finisher of my FAITH-Christ Jesus! Haha, lets press on one and all!

I have just realised, or rather this is what I feel about Philipians 4:6-7.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

It is really commiting everything to God through prayer and allow God to grant us the peace that transcends all understanding. This verse isnt about prayer. Ha, really it isnt. But its a comfort to anxious hearts, that if we commit every burden, every care to Him, He will give us the peace and assurance that will surpass all understanding, (that makes us worry and fear). This peace will also guard your heart and mind, from any anxieties.

Haha I think I talk too much. If you have to patience to read until here, I'm amazed. Oh wells. BUt I think in the end I hope that you are able to take back some pointers and be encouraged by what is said here.

Remember, the road is long, weary and painful. Let us go on, press on, together. And whatever befall us, never falter nor be discouraged, but let us be strong in the Lord!

My deepest prayers that we can continue to keep our hearts will all dilligence and abide in our Savior's presence.

Press on! : )