Holidays

The unofficial holidays started this week! Ohwells, the official one supposed to be next tuesday, but there is nothing much happening in school now already. Maybe some games, seminars and talks.

I'm resting at home now, even though there is school today because I am thoroughly burnt out and exhausted over what has been happening the past few weeks. I definitely was unable to find good rest. Day after day, moment after moment activities seems to pour into my life one by one. Trainings may even take up one third of my day, numerous hours spent travelling from a place to another frequently through the day, school, what little time I have for myself! Each day I reach home from training at about 8 plus I just wanna collapse onto my bed and sleep, but each time there is something that will keep me awake till at least 11. If this continues, which I definitely think it will, what shall then be of me?

Physically demanding it may be but the richness of God's blessings on my life has been continually refreshing my weary body. Taxing it has all been, but resting in Jesus gives peace, comfort and joy. Every moment every hour the Lord teaches and moulds, He uses every mountain and tide to shape us and hence suffer we may have at times, the fruit of each testing brings much comfort and assurance, joy even to know what God is working in our lives.

Holidays- the much talked about thing for the past weeks of our lives, yet to me, haha I feel that holidays only gives an excuse for twice a day training to take place. With each exciting and widely anticipated activity that our blessed youth ministry organises, comes a little depressing thought that I may not be able to make time for these activities. The youth meetings, Youth Camp, each so dear to my heart, yet I have to, many times to come, turn it away. I miss the fellowship, I really do. I delight in the thought that the Lord is all that I need, because at many times I have Him as One I run to and hide and abide in. He is my Rock in a weary land! The Lord Jesus is my very best Friend. I always question, "But should a christian live without fellowship?" We were not made to live alone I guess. To be real honest, I fear the lack of opportunities to come by may leave me detached from our dear youths, and even to be numbed to that effect. I am apprehensive that I will forget what it means to fellowship. It has been so long since we've sung hymns and praises joyfully together by the piano, it has been ages when we have prayed together, even through the night, it has been long since we shared and poured out our hearts that brethrens may feel for one another. I feel fellowship isn't merely getting together to have fun and enjoy, moreso it should include edification and encouragement, lifting one another's spirit to the Lord. I read in the biography of Watchmen Nee of fellowship, likeminded brethrens gathering often to fellowship in worship, prayer, understanding the fellow's needs and breaking of bread. Is not this fellowship, sweet and pure? May the Lord teach us to fellowship, brothers and sisters, in His name. And may He teach me to wait on Him patiently.

Nonetheless I look forward to whatever and wherever the will of the Lord leads me, youth meetings or not, youth camp or not, where does peace lies but in His will, what more perfect and pleasant than His way. The joy to know God is ever near me cast away every fear and loneliness. Hiding beneath the shadow of His wings, knowing Him as my only joy and only strength is something I would not exchange for anything. Can I not see each training sessions as myself being sent into the mission field to work? To be an example in every way, to be an encouragement to those who need one, to be a light and beacon pointing the way of salvation through Christ. Who should be deprived of service? Lord, let me serve!