Chiang Mai

Sawadee-ka! Sabaidee mai?

Well Im back from the trip. Haha.. People these days cant or wont read blogs and so they end up sending me overseas messages while Im in Thailand asking me why I didnt go to church. Heh, I wont ponn church la pls. Yeah, so I have been in Chiangmai for the past 6 days and 5 nights. It sure has been a super slack and relaxing trip. Physically and mentally it has been all well, enjoyed myself thoroughly. However, spiritually Im afraid I have to confess I have not been well

Anyway the trip was of much fun, especially with most of my track teammates and a few school mates who are of much fun and amusement. I definitely got to know my friends better and to learn to watch out for each other. Jus that too much of such company has its negative effects too. The bible says that "Evil company corrupts good habits". Indeed I've seen it come true through this camp. Though they have been a nice bunch of friends, who contributed greatly to the fun and took care of me alot while I was on the trip, they havent been entirely edifying and encouraging, and perhaphs took on a negative role on my spiritual life with their worldly habits. But all in all, I would say they have been extremely pleasant if only I stood more firmly and had more faith.

I feel that I have been a little more open minded in the way I view many things now, nonetheless I do not realise whether its suppose to be a good or bad thing. Does open minded definitely means compromisation of my standards? Certainly not, but Im afraid for me theres some relation between both of them. Well, I definitely hoped to learn more and see more through this camp. I actually looked forward to more of my physical enjoyment than as a spiritual break. Perhaphs I've stooped too low in.. tolerating vulgarities flying across the room continuously, failure to spend good time with the Lord daily and speaking things that do not edify. It is definitely true that a little compromise leads to another compromise, and many.

Spiritually, Im drained. I figure out I lacked so much grace to do and desire the spiritual things that I craved for before- communion with God, spiritual growth, ministry. Yet.. I don't understand why Im not and I cant do anything about it. My quiet time's been dry and is becoming shorter each day.When grace permits, I find myself pleading for resoration and revival for my soul.. but soon Im back to square one. I feel I have stopped completely in trying. Dunno whether its a good or bad thing because I seem rather contented, physically, in the state that I am! Oh.. that the Lord will look upon me, a useless weakling with mercy and patience, and by His grace and His grace only restore me.

Yet physically Im craving for so much.. vainity.

Nahh, its not so appropriate to state the things that I covet. But as much as I do not want to stumble anyone walking uprightly in Christ, reading my blog, I would say that though I may seem satisfied outwardly with the physical things that I have, really life becomes empty and purposeless without Christ. I havent felt peace which sweeps over my spirit. I seem to lose direction in my life. And before I know it, the things that I desire physically pass away quickly just as His word said.."and the world is passing away" But conclusively, "he who does the will of God abides forever".

But hey! God will grant grace wouldnt He? I definitely aint satisfied with life right now. But I definitely need more grace to seek His face once again.

So.. back to my camp experience. The camp was a extremly slack one because half the time I was sleeping away in the squatters. The first and the last day was in some small maybe 2-3 starts budget holiday inn. The first night was spent watching soccer, haha, yeah the FA cup Liverpool vs. West Ham. Well, guess Liverpool made a similar comeback every year after falling short earlier. Gerrard is super zai mann. The last two equalizers he made sent me running out of my room into the corridors looking for others to celebrate the goalsl with. Haha. So much for the first soccer night. The next day we headed to some waterfall which we climbed up and down several times. Okay.. Den was the 2-3hrs trekking to the Karen village where we spent 1 night. The trek supposedly was nothing, but with a 10kg bag on my shoulders it meant everything. There was nothing much to do at the villages, so we spent most of the time sleeping, playing cards and exploring. Village life definitely was simple, peaceful, slow-paced.The first night's sleep was quite terrible cos we squeezed 15 people into small squatters. There were three tribes joined side by side in this part of the jungle. They were the Karen tribe, the Lisu tribe and another tribe whose name I cant remember. In fact these three tribes were mostly Christianized. Lisu tribe, a name which sounded so familiar, were christians and I kinda admire the missionaries who came all the way in to witness to these villages and tribes. My first night in the Karen village I was thinking how good it would be if I could do something for these people when I grow up.. Probably I would. Then the next day was a 3-4 hours trek to the Palong village. The trek was super tiring cos we had to trek up and down like 3 4 mountains. Particularly there was this part of the trek where we were so high up that the clouds seemed a little distant away. Not only that the trekking route was so narrow that it barely fitted out two small feet. One slip could really mean a great fall downhill. Thankfully no one fell. Well Im actually quite glad I got to do things that I never could have done in Singapore. Under the watchful eyes and protective hands of our parents, we were never allowed to take such risks. A trek in small Bukit Timah hill probably meant paved walkways and handrails for narrow passages. Here, the guide had to use a machete to pave the way for the trek as if we were the first ones walking along the route. Ok.. then we reached the Palong village. This tribe, along with another called Lahu tribe were mainly, buddhists. They lie in a area near the Burmese borders. We spent two days and two nights there, with definitely better accomodation. The squatteres were much bigger, the toliet facilities much better. Nothing much happened other than the water pipping project our school undertook as CIP to help them pipe from the water source and the campfire. Other than that I was sleeping my way through as my friends played cards. So everything was nice and relaxed, no stress, no pressure. After the 3 days spent in the villages, me and my friends kinda missed the village lifestyle. It was really simple and easy and most importantly there werent complications such as in the city. It was a rather interesting and inspiring cultural experience and I believe I made a right choice in opting for this camp. I wouldnt miss such an experience.. Heh and I kinda figure out the things that I have taken for granted back at home- the clean water supply, the warm shower, the "cleaner" food, the lightings and everything. Then after two nights stay we left for the elephant ride and the river rafting. It was definitely not exciting but it was refreshing and relaxing. The last night was the night I looked forward to the past few days- shopping at the night bazzar. Shopping was great, haha, it was rather an interesting experience slashing the prices and bargaining with the shopkeepers in english. I realised I had to speak broken english in order to communicate with them. OH. I lost my voice that night, I think its because for the past 3 days at the village, I ate 6 pieces of toast each morning. haha, so up till now, Im speechless. Supposedly the last night was soccer night too, Champions League finals, Arsenal vs. Barcelona. However I was too tired to watch with my friends. I knonked out but Barca won 2-1, as expected. The last day, nothing very interesting happened. They visited some temple, I waited outside. We had 30mins at a shopping mall near the Chiangmai airport. There was no time for any shopping I guess. But prices were roughly the same there as in Singapore. So.. that wraps up my camping trip. Slow-paced, fun refreshing and relaxing.

For now.. Its back to the last 8 weeks of training before Nationals Track and Field. Argh, Im so off-fit now. Havent been training much. Gaining so much fats cos havent been burning any calories lately. But I really need a direction for this next 8 weeks. So really need restoration to the Lord.

Great Singapore Sales coming. Haha. Im quite excited, dunno why, for the first time. Have quite some stuff to get.

June camps in 2 weeks time too. Hopefully.. there would be a revival for all of us. I know I don't wanna remain in the state that I am now, but I need His grace and His upholding hand, alot.

For now, do pray for me. I know the last few entries have been rather sian and depressing but yeah, I know He will lead me by the still waters. And I know the Lord is still my shepherd.