2006-2007

Psalms 27

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell.
3 Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident.
4 One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple.
5 For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock.
6 And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy; I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the LORD.
7 Hear, O LORD, when I cry with my voice: have mercy also upon me, and answer me.
8 When thou saidst, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, LORD, will I seek.
9 Hide not thy face far from me; put not thy servant away in anger: thou hast been my help; leave me not, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation.
10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.
11 Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies.
12 Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty.
13 I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
14 Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.


Wait on the Lord, be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord. I came by this Psalm that I share during the 2005 Youth camp, and it is indeed a very encouraging Psalm. The Lord is my light, and my salvation; whom shall I fear?

Its the first day of year 2007. Honestly, I felt the year 2006 breezed past me so quickly, there werent exactly milestones for me to look back on. But a reflection of the past year would bring me to the conclusion that, "if we are faithless, He remains faithful, because He cannot deny Himself". The Lord has been very gracious and merciful to me through the past year. Giving me results I perhaps didnt deserve, guiding me through a stressful and difficult year of studying and training, keeping me in His power and continually revealing Himself to me! Would I say I have drawn closer to His side, yes- perhaps, by His grace. Would I agree I have grown in the grace and knowledge of the Savior- yes, according to His will. But I understand and know that when at times I do not seek God, He has gently led me back by the gentle waters into shady green pastures. Guess in areas where I have failed this year, perhaps by this renewed life and faith I may by His grace, find victory in Christ Jesus this year.

Thanksgiving would definitely include the freedom and liberty that God has blessed me with this year. Also, the many answered prayers that have been often taken for granted. James 1:17, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning" (: thanks for sweet, loving friendships God has blessed. Thanks also for working in the lives of my family and loved ones. Much thanks for a wonderful and blessed relationship I can have with the Lord too. It has been often times sweet, satisfying and fulfilling. (: my only regret is that it has not been ALWAYS that nice, for I turn coldly away from Him.

Haha, what actually are the significant events that has happened last year? (: Think when I did really badly for my cross country nationals, it was really a very low point in my life this year. I remembered how a few days were spoilt because of it. Guess too much hopes were pin upon the corruptible crown instead of the incorruptible crown I should be focused on. thank the Lord for seeing me through it. Also, something quite sweet happened during the June period, especially through june camp. rights? (: Think there are many spiritual high points as well as low points I have experienced through last year. But perhaps they havent been life-changing to leave a deep impression upon me. Nonetheless, thank God for them.

Philippians 3:13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

Yes, forgetting the things behind, reach forth unto those things which are ahead. This one thing I'll do. Year 2007...

A new chapter? Its always good to start things fresh and anew I guess. I usually love things when they are new. Expectations? Resolutions? I shan't touch on them yet. Let me share some of my burdens weighing upon me first. Yet knowing 1 Peter which says, "casting all thy cares upon Him, for He careth for thee" this shall we do.

First, let me talk about ministry. To whom much has been give, much more would be required. The Lord has impressed greatly upon my heart the past two months about this. something I felt I have neglected the past year. I feel I need to be stepping up and out in faith into service, into things I never would do, but what the Lord calls I must obey. I seek direction and His will first. And as the song goes, "Lord send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burdens on me, only sustain me." Make me willing to follow. I should no longer hide behind the excuses of not having gone through baptismal or parental objection but wholly follow the Lord, in obedient service. But where and how, I ask Him to show.

Secondly, I shall confess that as much as it is a struggle for many of us youths, I very much struggle with relationships. In the sense that I feel a relationship that hasnt been surrendered, can very much be a snare, as it is a great blessing from the Lord. I do not want to be hindered in my pursuit for God because I refuse to let go of something simply because I want things my way. I ask to practice Proverbs 3:5-6 which teaches us to trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not on thine own understand. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy path. Ps 37:5, "delight thyself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of thy heart"

Thirdly, as I enter JC in one days time, I can't help but worry whether I will be able to stand my ground and be that light for the Lord, diffusing the fragrance of Christ wherever I go. As I shared, I have been encouraged that God is the one who goes before me (Deut 31:8) and that God has not given us the spirit of fear but of love, of power and of a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7). Yet I know I have to purpose in my heart like Daniel did (Daniel 1:8), to stand my ground like Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego (Daniel 3:17-18), to flee from temptations like Joseph did, to be like Abraham, a pilgrim and stranger on earth (Heb 11:13) [make me a stranger Lord!] and to say, "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" as Joshua did. (Joshua 24:15) I know my weaknesses, I know I am very much easily tempted by the love of the world, its vainity, the girls I would spend 5 days with, pride, etc. And I am thankful God knows my weaknessed, for we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathise with our weaknesses. And in 1 Cor 10:13 He promised no temptation would be too great for me to bear, and where sin abound, grace abounds more. I know the words that ring with the song, "Choices I make each day, determine if I'll obey, and follow You, Trusting You, Guide me I pray" seems to pin point the direct problem. Will I honor the Lord with my choices? I pray for wisdom to make these choices. Is the year ahead gonna make me or break me? I ask God to keep me in His power and that I would be walking worthy of my Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God (Colossians 1:10) As I read sandra's entry, think its really true. To be asking ourselves what PLEASES the Lord, not ourselves. James 4:15, "Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that'" I know this choices would be more difficult then it is now, because I would very much be alone when I make this decisions. but blessed is He who is persecuted for His sake or the sake of the gospel. Other than the difficult choices I would have to make, I need to be able to live, that not I but Christ be seen in me. More than promoting my own abilities, I need to diffuse the fragrance of Christ and shine Christ's light into the darkness. God help.

If the Lord wills, we shall live to do this or that. I hope and pray in the year ahead to be soft and sensitive to the voice of the Lord, to say like little samuel, "Speak Lord, for thy servant hear" and be willing to obey whatever the cost! I want to grow in my love, zeal and passion for the Lord and be seriously burden for His work and His people. Sometimes I look at myself, and then I look at those around me, and I know my life is centered about and around the person, Jesus Christ, which may seem to perculiar to the watching world. But "the love of Christ compels us", because we belong entirely to God, first by creation and second by salvation, there is absolutely no reason why we should not live our lives FOR God and FOR His glory!

Benji just left for the states. I think I will miss him greatly. A close brother and friend, blessing and encouragement to many, faithful and zealous in service. I think what makes Benji who he is now, is, by the grace of God, he surrendered his entire life in His hands and held back nothing from the Lord. As he shared himself, a denying of self, taking up of cross and following Him. Im glad when God called for him to enter full time, his reply was "Here am I, send me"!

Yea, though what Daniel shared yesterday was really tedious and deep something really spoke to me was that we should no longer hide behind anything or anyone else, but come and see ourselves before God. Let no youth hide behind their brother or sister or even their parents anymore, let no youth hide behind the youth ministry, children minstry or even the church, let no youth hide themselves behind the practice of church going, bible studies or service but let each one come before God and seek Him. For each of us shall give an account of himself to God.

Shall end with the lyrics of the song which really spoke to me:

Lord help me be, consumed with thee
So that for me to live is Christ.